I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
