Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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