Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
