o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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