i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Sorry about my life...
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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