We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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