Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
