what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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