Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
