Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
