They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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