Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
