whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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