is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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