in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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