i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Someone shattered a urinal.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
