8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
