he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
