Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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