Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
My feet surprised me
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