we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
