is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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