tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
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