doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
