Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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