Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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