I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
You pole danced in your parka.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
