Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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