I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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