so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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