C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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