i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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