I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
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