Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
