It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
