....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
