I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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