I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
