help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
