when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
