Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
