i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i dont even know how to be here
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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