Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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