i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
