I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
