and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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