I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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