Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
