By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
