Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
he puts the penis in happiness.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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